" I don't know how to get help for my mental health"

 Assalamualaikum and hi everyone. How are you been doing? I hope everyone is healthy and happy. Since the day I open up about my mental health and became part of mental health advocate, I've been receiving a few similar questions. I am literally nobody in the mental health advocate community, but I have friends and a really small circle on my blog.

Recently, one of my blog readers dm me personally thanking me for sharing my stories inspires her to keep on fighting and seek help. I can't help but feel happy and grateful that I can help some people. Honestly, I just want to thank each of you that read my stories because you make me feel heard. 

Anyway, on today's entry, I just want to share how to seek help or get your mental health check-up. 

Disclaimer!

I am not a professional, therapist, counsellor, or psychiatrist. I have no qualification in advising people on mental health matters. This entry is made from my point of view and is meant to be a discussion topic. 

Taking the first step to check-up our mental health is not an easy step to take. It takes courage, time, energy and more. But most importantly, the first step can be so clueless and helpless. Not going to lie I took about 4-6 months to figure out how to take the first step. I talked to a few advocates, fighters and survivors. I read a lot of Twitter threads. I watch a lot of videos. Finally, in Jun 2021, I took courageous steps by signing up for an online Mental Health screening. Feel free to check my experience on this entry [here]

So, that was my story. What about you? To take the first step you have a few options.  You may choose to go to Klinik Kesihatan and ask for a consultation (request from the doctor in Klinik Kesihatan to see a psychiatrist in hospital if necessary),  Check-up at the closest Mentari centre, a Government hospital with a psychiatry unit. These are very affordable services,  I believe ranging from RM5-RM30 (I might be wrong). Or, if you have some extra money you can go to private hospitals and clinics. I am not really sure about the prices.

If you feel like, you just need therapy or you don't want any medication. You can register for sessions with a counsellor, clinical psychologist or certified professional. If you have no idea, where to look for these services, you can check out aloe.mind, caracara.space or ripple.community on Instagram. There are more services out there, but these three are the most familiar to me. These services can be expensive for some, but still in an affordable range starting from RM25-RM250. Do check out those pages because sometimes they do have promotions and free check-ups. If you are in an emergency or any life-threatening situation contact befrienders at o3-76272929 (free service).

Personally, I go through the therapy route just because I find it really flexible and I can choose my therapist. Also, some of the services/platforms are conducted online. It is really up to you to make the choice. If you think diagnosis and medication are important, choose Klinik Kesihatan or Hospitals.

Besides, it is important for you to know the types of professionals available. There are psychiatrists, clinical psychologists, counsellors and trainees. Psychiatrists are the professionals that can diagnose and their treatment approach is medications. Clinical psychologists can diagnose but the approaches are psychotherapy like Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT). Counsellors, on the other hand, use a more person-centred approach like talk therapy. For trainees, they are final year master's students. I believed trainees are highly supervised and competent to help you. 

If you are still hesitant and not sure when to actually seek help. You can start by taking the screening or test first. Just to get a general idea about your mental health. I know it's going to be scary and I know a big part of you want to reach out. It's okay, take your small steps, and gather some courage. You are not alone, there are more people fighting alongside you. 

That is all for this entry. If you have any experience by any chance please share it in the comment section down below. Let others know they are not alone.

See you in the next entry. Bye <3

Is it okay to feel this way?

 Assalamualaikum and hi everyone! It's already 5 days into 2021, I actually want to do like 2020 appreciation post but I ended up not doing it and I just want to write about something else. Anyway, how are you guys? I hope each of you is doing good. I've been better these days.

2020 has thought me a lot of things especially with all this self-love discovery. (Oh, if you are new here be sure to check my other entry to keep up with my journey a little bit.) One thing that I discover in 2020 that changed my perspective about humans or feelings is that the validity of feelings. 

I know a lot of people that are struggling with themselves and often questioned their feelings, including me. Sometimes we just keep asking and telling ourselves "why am I feeling this way?", "I should not feel this way", "Is this feeling normal?", I should stop feeling this way".  I always have this kind of thought whenever I have this weird, overwhelmed kind of feeling which I can't really explain. But I hope you get it. 

I learned that whatever you are feeling is true and it is okay to feel that way. Your feeling is valid. We've been through so much in our lives and we can't just expect it to be all happy and good. It's okay to feel sad, angry, excited, irritated, or every single emotion that exists. But sometimes, people around us just don't understand and making us confused. They even compared themselves who had it worst or better. For example, Alle telling Belle she should not feel sad and hurt because she falls from the chair while Alle falls from the stairs, and it hurts Alle more. Does this mean Belle's feeling is invalid and Belle should not feel hurt or sad because Alle had it worst than her? No, she is entitled to her own feeling and life is not about competition. 

Yes, we should be grateful for everything that we had and some people had it worst than us. But don't make "bersyukur" as a concept to invalidate your feeling. Make it a concept to change and improve yourself. Understand your feeling at the moment then look around you and then remind yourself what you are grateful for today. It goes something like "I am sad today because everything isn't going my way but I got to eat my favorite food and I got to meet my friends". This so hard to explain in words. But when I realized this, It just gets better. You need to admit that you are feeling something, tell yourself it's okay to feel that way, and then look towards the solutions to avoid the same overwhelming feeling in the future.

Saying this is easier than to be done. As a person who deals with herself, I used to blame myself or telling myself I shouldn't feel this or that way and as a person who is standing by as friends or strangers, I used to talk about how people should feel. I was immature and probably know nothing better. I feel bad about it.

I think this is the best thing that I learn last year. Although it seems good, I can still be wrong but learning about the validity of feelings does make me feel a little better. Friends, I still have a long way to go but I do really wish I can be a small help to any of you out there. 

Does this entry make sense? I feel like it is such a weird way to write this all up but I just really want to share about this. If you have any other opinions about this topic, feel free to drop comments! See you guys in the next entry.

What keeps you going?

 Assalamualaikum and hi everyone. I've been wanted to write something a few times and every time it just failed. If you saw this entry please, say congratulations to me hahaha.

"What keeps you going?' I received this question on my Instagram's story from one of my best friends. It takes me a while to answer this and to put my words together. I did answer her on my stories but I think I have a lot more to say on this topic. If you are new to my blog or just didn't keep up with my life journey, I just want to let you guys know that I'm struggling with my life and I'm on a journey in discovering  "self-love". Being sentimental, emotional, and a weird type of person. I just can't stop but thinking about this question so hard!

I am nobody, I have no great achievement, I don't know why my friend ask me that because honestly, she has more great achievement than me. But I know that she always respects me for able to keep doing what I like. This is my answer for anyone out there who may need this. 

The biggest reason for what keeps me going in whatever I did until now is that I believe wholeheartedly that every single human being in this world has their own pace, own destiny, and their own journey. Some of us may have the same destination but we may have detoured from the normal route. A lot of times, I feel very insecure when someone of my age or younger is very successful and I almost give up frequently. But, if I give up, will anything change? Will the person who I feel insecure about suddenly became unsuccessful?  We are all labeled as "humans" but little did we know, each of us is unique and capable of amazing things in our own way. Keep moving, if you are tired, take a break. 

I don't know how I'd look like at the finish line, I want to know
But for now I run on the road ahead of me, I'll decide later
Until then, I'm not looking at others
Don't forget my speed, my lane, my pace - Stray Kids, My Pace

Next, positivity. Lame. I know. It is so hard for us to look on the positive side when things didn't go our way or we are just tired of our own life. I agree. But somehow, I always force myself to believe that everything happened for reasons and I should be grateful that the problem that I have could be worst. This cannot be applied to everyone out there because our capabilities to cope with problems are different. However, I'm just going to put it out there that positivity does help us in a hard time. It will in the slightest way possible, it will help. I always think that people who are successful in their life have the light of positivity in their life. No reasons for us to stop searching for positivity.

This is another crucial point for me. Be happy with every little thing. I realize that I should be happy with every little thing when I always found myself being sad for not able to find a boyfriend. I'm 22 years old, being single my whole life and my friends are having a boyfriend, getting engaged, and getting married. It might sound funny but that's the reality, the pressure to keep up with society. When I was able to find happiness in the smallest thing, it felt good and make me want to keep living. I am doing business, but till now I did not have a lot of customers but when I promote the products and people reply to it without even buying them. I feel happy and grateful. I feel like I can keep doing this! (If you want to buy Korean skincare hit me up @thesthatix_ on IG) Shameless plug.

This is kind of personal but another reason for me to keep going is that I try to stop putting hopes in other people. I feel like, in the end, it's only me in my journey. Asking for help and having someone else alongside is better than being alone. But sometimes, the scariest and the biggest fight that needs to be done is with your own self. I don't know if this makes sense to any of you but I hope you got what I mean. For example, I wanted to get out of my comfort zone but at the same time, I was hoping that someone will guide me. If those people who are meant to help you failed to meet your expectation, you'll feel sad, clueless, and pretty much feels like everything isn't going on your way. In simpler words, expect less. 

Lastly, don't be too hard on yourself. You had already go through so much in your life. Hug yourself and pat your own shoulder and tell yourself "You have done a good job, let's keep going". 

That's all for this entry, share with me what are the reasons for you to keep going in whatever you do! See you in the next entry.

Skincare 101: Things you should know before getting into skincare. | Malaysia

Assalamualaikum, Hi, Salam Sejahtera, こんにちは and 안녕하세요 everyone, I'm back with a new entry to help some of the friends or any of you who need some help in taking care of your skin, how to start doing skincare or you are already doing your skincare but you want to improve your skincare routine! 

Oh! Salam Aidilfitri everyone!

* Disclaimer!*

I am not a dermatologist, aesthetician, specialist nor beauty guru. I am only someone who is into beauty stuff including skincare. All information that I share on my entry is all based on my readings, videos on youtube, and my experiences. At the end of this entry, I will include links to youtube videos where you can learn more about skincare.

Before I start further into how to take care of your skin, I want all of you readers to give attention to what I am going to tell because it is pretty important; 

• Please! keep this in mind that not all products are suitable for everyone. If you saw a product review or a testimonial, DO NOT believe it immediately and purchase it. 
• DO NOT buy any local product that is not approved by Kementerian Kesihatan Malaysia (KKM). I do not want to be biased, but I would personally avoid using local skincare products.
• DO NOT buy any skincare products without prior knowledge about the products. This is to help you to save money and avoid your skin become worst.
• Skincare needs to be done consistently in order to achieve your desired skin.

Now, let's get into things you should know before you start doing your skincare. 

        

            1. Know your skin type and skin concern.

Understanding your skin is quite important. This is because to have an effective skincare routine you need the products that will benefit your skins. Knowing your skin type will help you in deciding what products you should buy. 

There are four types of skin, which are oily, dry, combination, and normal. There are a lot of videos on youtube that show you how to know your skin type, you can check them out, take your time to understand your skin type. My personal favorite video on how to know your skin type is by Hyram.

Next is regarding skin concern, examples of skin concern are sensitive skin, acne-prone skin, dehydrated skin, dull skin, etc. Skin concern can be known before you start doing skincare or it won't show until you actually did your skincare. For example, acne-prone skin can be seen prior to a skincare routine, it is obvious on your skin. Meanwhile, sensitive skin will happen after you apply your products. Some people may put sensitive skin in skin types but I personally believe it is skin concern. Because someone can have oily skin and sensitive skin at the same time.

My personal skin type is dry and I have sensitive skin. I need to be extra careful when choosing my skincare.

            2. Cleansing! 

(This is my current facial cleanser that I use)

This is the most basic thing to do, once you get into skincare. Please! buy a facial cleanser, do not use your body wash or any other soap. But you also need to know that, some facial cleanser does contain a harsh ingredient that can irritate your skin in a longer period. I will link a few youtube channels for you to understand how ingredients in facial cleanser work and what ingredient you should avoid. 

The most appropriate time to wash your face is 45 seconds to 1 minute. If you wash too fast, it won't remove the dirt but you wash for too long it will strip off the hydration. When you wash your face DO NOT do it roughly! Be kind to your skin. After you cleanse your skin, you should continue other skincare steps. If you stop at face wash it might not be that helpful. This is because washing your face does strip off oil on your face if you have dry skin it will feel tight and might get flaky and for oily skin, the skin will produce more oil because of lack of moisture. Therefore, basic steps if you want to start skincare are a cleanser and moisturizer. 

If you are someone who wears makeup or using sunscreen, I recommend you guys to use double cleansing approach. I will make another entry on double cleansing if you are interested! 

            3. Umm.. scrubbing?

I know a lot of people actually include scrubbing in their skincare routine or they just buy scrub because everyone is doing it. Well, the scrub is an exfoliation process, where you remove the dead skin that builds on your skin and cleanses your face deeper. Using physical scrub is not wrong but you need to know that there are few physical scrubs that can damage and irritate your skin. For example, St. Ives apricot scrubs are so harsh to the skin. 

If you want to use the scrub you need to avoid scrubs that contain large exfoliants/beads. Go with smaller beads or beads that can dissolve like a sugar scrub. Remember to handle the scrubs gently. Do not rub on your face like you scrubbing away the dirt on your shirt. 

So, I would recommend you guys to exfoliate your skin using a chemical exfoliator. Chemical exfoliator works more gently on your skin compared to physical scrub. There are a few types of chemical exfoliator that works differently on the different type of skin. To understand further about chemical exfoliators, I suggest you guys do some readings. I will make another entry on exfoliating because this topic is LONG!

These are three things you should know before getting into skincare. I know there are actually more things that we need to know. But for this entry, I think this is enough for you to work on your brain. You need to take your time and learn. Your skin can not improve overnight. I personally believe buying skincare is an investment, it can be a bad investment or it is profitable. 

Here are youtube channels that you can learn from:

Hyram, Mixed Makeup, Maisarah Mahmud (But she is inactive now), and Noel Faizal. 

So, If you have any questions drop it on the comment section below and I will try my best to answer. See you in the next entry!

 

COVID-19- Self-improvement space.

Assalamualaikum and hi! I'm back with another entry. Since we are still in RMO/MCO/PKP, I'm willing to write a little bit.

I bet staying at home is boring and you have nothing better to do other than sleeping and eating. I do that too. I've been sticking to my bed since forever hahaha. Locking down in my own room isn't a big problem for me because I'm someone who loves staying inside and spend my time with my laptop and phone. In simpler words, I'm in my actual habitat hahaha.

However, I believe this is the most proper and good time for each of us to improve ourselves. We can actually improve ourselves in a lot of areas. I personally trying to lose weight but jokes on me cause I keep end up on the bed watching anime.

Instead of doing nothing and feel bored, what you can do is do something you always want to do but you can't because of time restrictions. For example, you wanted to learn your second or third languages but you can't because you are busy. Now is the most appropriate time to do so, you have ample of time to waste and you can find a way to do so.

If you are still clueless about what you can do, here are a few things that I can suggest for you.

1. Learn a new language or improve your current language
2. Explore your cooking abilities
3. Baking
4. Learn how to play a musical instrument
5. Write poems
6. Improve your makeup skills
7. Indoor workout
8. Self-care (Meditation, beauty care)
9. Decorate your personal space
10. Learn how to draw
11. Practice singing
12. Learn how to dance
13. Do art

This is only applicable if you want to do something productive and fun during this MCO. If you are lazy and you are good at being lazy, not feeling boring. Then you are good! 

You can do a lot of things by staying at home. So please stay at home and let's flatten the curve. We still have a life to go back to and we need to stop COVID-19 as soon as possible. We are fighting this together! 

What are your favorite things to do while staying at home? Share it with me. See you in next post~ 

Mascara for beginners

Hello there welcome back to my blog, so it's been awhile yeah haha. so for today's post i would like to share few tips on how to apply mascara for beginners.

Mascara is the most important thing in doing makeup.. applying mascara can make your eyes look bigger and you loom prettier *winks  


1. so first thing you gonna do is find the right mascara~ mascara comes with different shades but mostly it's black and different mascara has different function.. example: thickens your eyelash, make your eyelash longer etc. i personally have more than 2 mascara because you gotta put on based on your mood haha.

2. next after you grab your fav mascara curl up your lashes girl~ curl them up. if you don't know how the curler looks like look at the image below :)

3. now.. open your mascara cap.. (bismillah dulu) when you pull out the wand the product will already be there.. so what you gonna do is place the wand on your eyelash based and pull slowly to the end of your lashes.

you gotta be careful while applying on mascara because the product can transfer to your eyelid or under you eyes if that happen.. grab a cotton bud and wipe it off. okay?

laaasstt but not least,, don't cry for boys when you have your mascara on because.....

so that's all.. if you have any question comment on the comment section or on the cbox okay~ and maybe i will update about my fav mascara in future~  see yaaaaa

Beauty: Tips to apply on Liquid Lipstick

cr: owner

Assalamualaikum and helloooo dear readers~ so.. this time i want to share with you guys how to apply liquid lipstick. especially matte lipstick for those have chapped, dry lips as you know matte lipstick can be so drying! and you want to make your lips look fuller you may need this tips.

Look at this bae, we want this kind of lips right. 

1. Exfoliate

okayy girls, exfoliate is so so important.. it will remove your dead skin.. How to exfoliate? Get your lip scrub and scrub it all over your lips OR you can apply on lip balm then take a wet tissue and gently rub all over your lips to kick those dead skin out. 

I always exfoliate my lips before i sleep so i won't wasting time exfoliating my lips in the morning or afternoon haha. If you guys want to save your money from buying lip scrub you can make it on your own.. click [Here] for tutorials

2. Lip balm

applying lip balm before sleep can smooth your application and it will prevent your lips from chapping through out the day. But sometimes when you put on lip balm you tend to apply it a lot... so what you gonna do is.. kiss behind of your hands to take off the excess product

3. Lip liner

Actually this step is an option. I personally didn't do this trick but i've seen it a lot on the internet how this help to make us put on liquid lipstick much easier. 

Sometimes putting on liquid lipstick will be so hard. it won't follow your lip line or maybe you want to make your lips look plump and full. So, draw on your lip line using those liner~ lip liner is affordable you can find them anywhere~

LASTLY!

Apply your liquid lipstick on your lips~ then you will have those sexy lips.! 

i think that's all for this post. If you want to see this in video you may request. as i do make youtube videos. or maybe no. i hope this can help you a little bit. 

Thank you for reading and have a nice day :)

-wait.. check out my latest youtube video [HERE]

Beauty: Face contour

Hellooo beautipull ladyy~ haha so yeah today i will be giving you guys few tips on face contour.. well most of my beauty tips is for beginners.. I hope i can help you~~

I love contour my face but i cannot afford to buy expensive contour kit. Malaysian people who are facing same problem with me. I will show you a budget countouring kit / bronzer. The price is so affordable. you guys should check them out~

These are 2 product that i have been using to contour my face.

Contouring you face will make your face smaller and giving your face more definition. Contouring face is so popular for american makeup style. 

.How to contour face?

cr. to owner

tutorial by chiutips.

Tutorial by wengie. i love heeerr

You guys can search on youtube a lot of beauty youtuber do a video on how to contour your face.. That's all that i want to share with you guys if you have question please comment i will try to answer you.. see yaa guyssss~!!

Tips: Losing friends

helloo people~ so lately i'm not in mood in updating any tips or any positive post lately because I'm full with negativety this few days. i'm freaking not in mood. I want to share with you guys about friends.. everybody does have friends but do we have "real" friends. since i was baby till i'm 17 i don't think i have problem with what called so "friend" it's normal to fight and get better and some friends leave you. it's normal okay totally normal..


but after i receive my SPM result.. everything change. i have few friends that claimed as my bestfriend left me.. i know her behavior very well because we are very close. she don't even ask my result don't even say hi to me anymore.. well there is few more firends who behave like that.. hey cmmon if we are bestfriend why would you leave me? because i'm stupid? nah we'll see in future.. well someone has told me before after you get you spm result only true friend will stay.. i though he talk nonsense but now i realize.. it's real..

1 person leave you. 10 more person will approach you- remember this!

If they are happy with their life go on.. i won't disturb thoo~ i'm happy with some people who stay by my side encouraging me support me and lend me their shoulders. they help me a lot.. there are some of my friend that are not even chatting with every single day but when i'm trouble they will be there for me. you know how that feel? ugh so happyyy.. they are awesome people. i love them.. I was known as a positive girl among my friend. but when i'm down they are my medicine..


so yeah guys if you ever feel like nobody needs you, lonely~ etc etc. chin up, don't be sad.. they don't deserve youu.. okayy. show them you are better without them. try make new friends~ because you deserve someone better~ okaaaayy.. That's all beautiful people.. i will update some more tips on beauty or some kpop review very soon.. so see yaaa~

Contact Lens or Spectacles?

Helloo~ ladies and gentleman.. so today i'm going to share with you guys my experience on wearing contact lens and spectacles..

credit to owner on weheartit/ lol

 Before i tried lenses i'm scared af. I thought i'll be hating on them a lot... but my friends do change my mind.. They keep talking about contact lens which make me curious more curious and soooo curious.. One fine day, after school finish i went to a mall with my mum. then i saw a promotion on contact lenses at the eyewear shop. I didn't plan to buy them but i just bought the contact lenses on that day.. so the worker(?) teach me how to put on and take off , how to clean my contact lenses.. so yeah that's the beginning of me wearing contact lenses / i wear a clear contact lens no color~


Why i love spectacles?
- spectacles is easy to take care. i mean you don't to clean them with solution, you can put them anywhere

- spectacles have nice frame /if you choose wisely xD

- I think i'm cute having them on my face /ngehehehe kidding.


Why i love lenses?
- You can see everything in HD. haha kidding i can see better with contact lenses i swear.

- It's is comfortable.. /having a freedom of nothing resting on my nose lol

- Lenses won't get dirty as spectacles..

- People can see my eye makeup better~

Why i hate spectacles?
- MY SPECTACLES WANNA PLAY HIDE AND SEEK!!! everytime i woke up in the morning i don't know where i put them. it's annoy meeeee haha

- The glasses easily get dirty (e.e) finger print is everywhere

- I feel like my eyes in the cage. i didn't have wide vision /lol.

- foggy glasses. this annoy me the most!! i can't enjoy my hot coffee -.-

- wearing 3-D Glasses on cinema with spectacles on. HUGE HEADACHE!

- They are sooo fragile.

- People won't notice my eye makeup~ the frame is disturbing lol

- i just hate them. okay.


Why i hate lenses?
- Taking them off. ugh i hate this the most!!

- While putting on, it suddenly drop off and you can't find them.. /cries

- Scared of falling asleep.. it might stuck on the eyeball. but so far so good / i slept for an hour it still fine.

- Confusion. i sometimes confuse either i'm having them or not / lol

- need to keep blinking so it won't get dry u.u

- Going on vacation and forget to bring the solution or case


Basically, I hate lenses and spectacles more than i love them.. and i envy those people who doesn't need them. I personally love lenses moreee~ so yeahhh that's all i think this will help you to decide whether to put on lenses or glasses..

Sadness can be cure

Hello hoomans~ so today i want to share with you guys how to be happy and get rid all of your sadness.. (before that, i'm sorry for my broken english)

as a human we have feelings, we can be happy, we can be mad and we can be sad. But do you really want to feel sad all the time? So let me give you some tips so you can be happy and keep positive

1. Crying

when you were very sad and you feel like crying, don't stop.. go on.. crying can make us feel better. well a lot better.. 

2. Tell someone

you can't hold your sadness alone you need to share with someone who you can believe. When you share your problem or anything that makes you sad you'll feel slightly better. if you don't have anyone to believe just write your thought in your diary.. but sharing with someone else is a lot better~ they can hugs you and make you comfortable. Just don't be sad alone... 

3. Think Positive

When you were sad you can't think straight you keep thinking negative stuff.. you keep asking "Why?" "Why is this happen?" "why can't they love me?" and more why.. well you need to remember everything happens for a reasons. you maybe sad now but not in future.. 

4. Entertain Yourself

After you done crying and telling someone.. You need to entertain yourself..Find something fun to do.. for me, i will listen to music or watch korean variety show.. if you have no idea what to do let me suggest.. /shopping,singing,dancing,eat and more.. 

 5. Sleep

You can't think positive , entertain yourself or tell someone.. all you can do is crying.. you keep on crying and can't move on.. Stop crying and sleep or maybe you can sleep while crying.. just close your eyes.. when you sleep, you'll relax yourself as you wake up you'll feel better~

Well, I hope those 5 things will be helpful..  Every one deserve to be happy.. and without sadness joy may not be exist /i hope you got it. haha

"You can't have a Rainbow without a little Rain